Fear of commitment and relationship titles seem to be a huge problem today. I say fear of commitment is stupid because if you spend all of your time with someone, give all of yourself to someone then tell yourself that you’re not “with” them so you ‘can’t get hurt’ chances are you will get hurt if they change this relationship in some way shape or form. If you don’t put yourself in this type of situation, that is fine, if that is what you want.
I have already made my own arguments about why weddings don’t matter but so much. Chasing a ring and chasing a person are two very different things. If you just want to have the big show and have people buy you stuff than you can have a fantabulous birthday, graduation or house warming party, without any legal documents (other than a lease) being signed!
As far as relationships go, each and every single one is different. A couple can be dating, without a title because they never had “the talk” and be more committed and there for each other than a couple that has been married for 12 years. Two people that have children together can not be in a relationship and do a great job taking care of those kids, and two seemingly happily married people with a child can have no desire to be together and teach that innocent child that people should stay together even if they hate each other.
If all your friends pressure you into getting married to a man that turns out abusive, are they all gonna get punched too? NOPE. If you put off getting into a committed relationship to someone that is your ‘soul mate’ because you don’t want to talk about it seriously, who are you hurting? You and that person, you say you love so much. It’s all iffy. You dive in or you don’t, but it should be what YOU want.
Do you want this person as your partner? Do they make you happy? Do you do your best to make them happy in return? Do you want to raise children with them? Do you agree that you never want children? Life events, personality traits, sense of humor, sensitivities, understandings, and desire to share that specific type of relationship with a person is what ties people together. Not jewelry, pieces of paper, or “what your friends think.”